Planning is key before attending a party!

Beginners Guide To Swinging- Top 10 Tips

Beginners Guide To Swinging- Top 10 Tips the best advice, from the most in-depth, knowledgeable girl! Before I ever attended my first swinging party, I researched online to find out as much as could from various sites and trawled through the frequently asked questions. The same topics came up time after time, and although they were useful, they did not give me the kind of practical advice I was looking for. Now, a few years later, having attended various events and clubs, I can share with you my ultimate top 10 tips for beginners attending a swingers party.

Here are a few of my favourite Top Tips for attending swinger parties:

  • Establish your rules and boundaries well in advance.
  • Buy something sexy to put on.
  • Plan your night well in advance
  • Always pack plenty of condoms!
  • Don’t put yourselves under pressure to perform.

I suppose you could call them beginners swinger party life hacks. So, lay back, relax, and let thiskindagirl teach you all I know about how to have stress free and super sexy swinging.

Beginning Swinging

  • Do your research. It sounds obvious, but you don’t want to attend a themed night that really isn’t your thing. As chances are you will not have a great experience. Most clubs have various themed nights over the course of the week, with the most popular one being on a Saturday night. Some clubs also collaborate with various swinging websites to bring you events that are open to their members. It pays to do your research first to ensure you are getting your value for money.   Some clubs are more engineered towards BSDM or various fetishes; such as golden shower or clubs that specialise in saunas. Choose your club carefully. If you’re not into gangbanging then I don’t suggest you attend a ‘greedy girls’ night for example.

How To Enjoy Swinging

  • Plan the whole weekend. If you have a party coming up in a months’ time, take steps to make the most of your time together as a couple. Perhaps you will make the night into a weekend break and travel to a different city? Do not plan anything too strenuous for the day after, especially as you probably will be getting to sleep quite late. Stay in bed the next morning and if you are in a hotel, order breakfast to your room. If not, then spoil one another. Have something special, really make time to enjoy the post swinger party feeling. Don’t let the usual weekend activities distract you. It’s all about quality time together!

Talking About The Rules Of Swinging

  • Have a good discussion about what you want to get out of the event. This sounds a little clinical, but trust me, sharing your desires is part of the joy. Been harbouring a fantasy you want to share? Now is the time to bring it up.  Don’t wait until the party has started to then start discussing, take time to get comfortable with one another’s desires and ideas. It will make the experience a much more positive one.

What To Wear When Starting Swinging?

splashing out feels great!
  • Go shopping for something new to wear. It doesn’t have to be an expensive piece of sexy lingerie or a new pair of heels, but splashing out on something new is a great boost to your self-esteem. Could you tie this in with your fantasies?  Does he want to see you in black lace knickers? Or perhaps you want to see him in them? Whatever it is that gets you going, make it happen. You don’t have to spend a fortune. I bought a lovely green camisole I wore to a private meet a while ago; it was £10 and made me feel super sexy.

Beginning Safe Swinging

  • Buy plenty of condoms in advance! I can’t stress to you how important it is that you stock up! I always visit a large supermarket or health and beauty store and buy a box along with my regular shopping. You can browse the selection and choose the right ones, as opposed to feeling under pressure to purchase whatever overpriced and limited ones they have at the off-licence closest to the club! I once met a guy who ordered a box of 50 from Amazon! Now, this was quite extreme, but the guy was prepared!

Arriving At A Swingers Club

  • Plan getting there and away easily. Now, I know your probably wondering what this has to do with swinging, but trust me, if you follow this advice, you will be arriving and leaving flawlessly. Again, do your research. Where is the club exactly? Are you driving? And if you are is there parking nearby? Are you staying close to the venue? All these things need to be researched, the last thing you want is to be limited by parking restrictions or get a fine! Most clubs list parking advice and close public transport links on their websites. If you’re taking a taxi or uber, are you telling them the exact address of the venue or close by? One club I attend, I always ask the uber to drop me at the nearest station and walk from there!

Attending A Swinger Club

  • Arrive in plenty of time. Again, it sounds obvious, but walking in when the party is already underway is not always best. Especially if it’s your first time at the venue or first swingers party. Arriving about 30 minutes after the doors open is my advice, most clubs will give you a guided tour and answer any questions you have. You can get a drink, relax, and become acquainted with space. Have a look at the various areas on offer and discuss how you can use them to your advantage between you. I suggest relaxing and chatting and treating it as a normal party for about an hour before you ‘get down to it’ even if it’s not your first time, the last thing you want is to feel rushed.

Start Swinging Slowly

Always play safely
  • Don’t put yourselves under pressure to ‘perform’. This is imperative to remember if it is your first time. There’s no right or wrong way to attend a party. Do as much or as little as you both feel comfortable with. No doubt you will see experienced swingers who are quite ‘cliquey’ with one another. Don’t be intimidated by them. It’s important to bear in mind that we all had to take the first few tentative steps once upon a time. Putting pressure on yourselves will result in you both having a negative experience.  Don’t feel pressure from other people to partake in things that you’re not comfortable with. Swinging should be a positive experience!

Have Great Sex First

  • This is probably my favourite top tip! Have sex with one another first, at home where you can really let loose. Get each other off in the comfort of your own home and really go to town on one another. Once you are both satisfied, you can attend the party feeling relaxed and ready to share. Sex creates bonds and draws us closer together, so get closer first.

Why Do People Swing?

  • Even if you do not dive into every situation you see at the club, its really useful to chat with the different types of people in attendance and find out why do they swing? As I have mentioned before in my other posts, swingers, in my experience, are some of the most down to earth people there are. Sharing ideas and information can be a great way to meet likeminded people and get used to verbalising your desires. I’m not saying that you share your deepest darkest fantasies with a stranger, but you can usually guess what people like by how they are dressed. If you fancy finding out about swinger cruises, ask the couple with the great tan. If you are curious about female domination, chat with the couple where he’s in a collar. These people do not bite! I can assure you; they will be happy to share!

I hope you have enjoyed my Beginners Guide To Swinging- Top 10 Tips. Please do get in touch with me. I’d be thrilled to hear from you! Much love, Thiskindagirl xx

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